Friday, July 28, 2006
laff
A nun in full black habit is walking past a bar when a drunk stumbles out, sees her, and punches her square in the nose. Before she can scream, he lands a sloppy one-two and an uppercut. When she goes down, he starts kicking her with his scuffed business shoes. As a crowd gathers, the drunk stops, staggers back, and slurs, "You're not so tough, Batman!"
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2 comments:
ok so after i posted this joke, someone countered wit
There were two nuns..
One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),
and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).
It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for
The past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.
SL: It's logical. He wants to rape us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes
at the most! What can we! do?
SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM: It's not working.
SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only
logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and
I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.
Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is
worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.
Then Sister Logical arrives.
SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here!
Tell me what happened!
SL: The only logical thing happened.
The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL: The only logical thing happened! . I started to run
as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.
SM: And?
SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me.
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL: The only logical thing to do.
I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL: The only logical thing to do.
He pulled down his pants.
SM: Oh, no! What happened then?
SL: Isn't it logical, Sister?
A nun with her dress up can run faster than man
with his pants down.
And for those of you who thought it would be dirty,
Say two Hail Marys!
to which I countered with my ULTIMATE nun joke, ( and I challenge you to fine a better one);
Two nuns, Sister Catherine and Sister Helen, are traveling through
Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a
traffic light.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny Dracula jumps onto the hood of the
car and hisses through the windshield.
"Quick, quick!" shouts Sister Catherine. "What shall we do?"
"Turn the windshield wipers on. That will get rid of the abomination,"
says Sister Helen.
Sister Catherine switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he
clings on and continues hissing at the nuns. "What shall I do now?"
she shouts.
"Switch on the windshield washer. I filled it up with Holy Water at
the Vatican," says Sister Helen. Sister Catherine turns on the
windshield washer.
Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and
continues hissing at the nuns.
"Now what?" shouts Sister Catherine.
"Show him you're cross," says Sister Helen. "Now you're talking," says
Sister Catherine.
She opens the window and shouts, "Get the fuck off the car!"
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